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The Ravages of Puberty (part one)

by Connie Danger

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1.
A splash shakes my morning dream Is that a giggle by the mountain stream? I sneak over to steal a look I’m straining to muffle my breathing A woman, or, no—a god? At play among the river rocks I slip falling in her lap When a spirit usurps me, moves my mouth for me I say Would you let me be near you? Would you let me be near you? Would you let me be near you? Would you let me be near you? Like testing for something sweat She takes her tongue-tip across my cheek And, boneless, I hit the floor When she flees in laughter with me calling after Would you let me be near you? Would you let me be near you? Would you let me be near you? Would you let me be near you? Now I’m glued on her like a moon Caught in her dark lagoon And I hum like a dumb machine Fearing I’ll miss her, my voice, a whisper Would you let me be near you? Would you let me be near you? Would you let me be near you? Would you let me be near you?
2.
Finally 04:56
The sun tears me, dead, from my grave I throttle my head and I pray An angel would skewer me through I roll over, then I see you Finally, I found someone to carry me To lift me up above the waves And lead me close to happiness Your love is the leg of my stool The hull of my boat, and the mule That drags me through this ugly dream Is love on my tongue when I scream? Finally Lady you’re driving my hearse You shoulder my box through the church Yeah, lady, you’re my final peace The one I’ve been dying to reach Finally
3.
I used to be immortal when in the elbow you lent me But now the joints of this machine that you built Have rusted far beyond mending I called myself a soldier, bought myself a gun I was shopping for the perfect revolution But now my gun is out of bullets, my army over run And I want to go home I remember being hungry, and I remember the anger I remember waking up every day and having something to fight for Now I’ve found a decent living with nothing left to need I do the daily motion, my member asleep And I stay awake throughout the night trying not to scream I wanna go home Now the night is almost over, and I dunno if I’ll get through My sun it never shone from the sky, it always shone from you Now I’ve plenty time ahead, I’m only twenty-five But just because I’m breathin don’t mean I’m alive Mama, can you hear me howling I wanna go home
4.
I’ve broken all my mirrors cause I look just like the bogieman My vision's swallowed by this New York City harmattan I see a woman’s grin explode under a warm caress I think about it later when I’m I’m coming of age I guess (I hope you understand) In the distance I can see you there Cigarette stuck in your face I near you as you stub it on a bright bodega canopy I don’t know what your deal is, but can I have some? I can’t recall how long it’s been since I’ve talked to anyone In a minute I am leaving all the things I believed in Everything I’ll ever need, lip-to-drink in front of me A flower in your pasture, my stem extending faster I bite my lip to fight to last but I’m I’m still coming of age, I guess I’d like you to think that I know what I’m doing But darling I ain’t so proud Truth is you topple my fortress to ruin If I do it wrong, would you help me out? You say, ‘baby boy, you better shut your mouth’ Now I stampede through the city fueled with alcohol euphoria Then I stumble through the midnight to your mattress in Astoria I see the battle won: the trumpets shout it from your face How deceiving is the fun of sleeping in a different place Another sun, another head, the happy one of August, dead Forgetting all I adored, I fade from you, afraid and bored Now I’m pushin’ rope, another bed I close my eyes and raise my head When your face usurps the one I’m with and I’m Baby I’m still coming of age, I guess I meant to say sorry when later I saw you, but some other words fell out Instead I asked whether you think of me ever You just stood there with a why’d-you-say-that frown I guess I never learned to shut my mouth I hope you understand

credits

released August 4, 2020

Songs - Connie Danger
Production - Connie Danger & Graham Stone
Drums - Dave Tedeschi

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Connie Danger New York, New York

Outer space tunes born in my little room.

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